January recap: 2017 was a cluster-F

Let’s assume for a brief moment that religious conservatives are right about climate change. Pretend it’s true that climate change is fake, and the Earth somehow survives long enough for man to expand out. Will the year 2017 be in history textbooks, marking the point at which everyone knew the American empire was starting to fail? How much damage can the majority of us take, before we become too destabilized by the gluttons at the top of our government and economy?

2017 is the year of the sociopath. The political events of 2016 turned us into a country that no longer respects facts, or words, or other humans. Since it is pretty much impossible to keep up with (or remember) everything that happened, I figure we should take a look back so that we can appreciate all the potentially important events that happened. Over this series, I’ll remark on some of the highlights.



  • US intelligence officials released a report stating that Russia massively interfered in the 2016 election, in favor of Trump. To this day, we’re still not sure how much is true, and how much is overblown, yet it continues to be the most important thing that fake liberals talk about on TV.
  • Prior to the inauguration, 4 depraved anti-Trump black people in Chicago kidnapped a mentally disabled white guy and tortured him. They posted videos to Facebook, yelling “F- Trump” and “F- white people,” so obviously there was national outrage.
  • Mass shooting: 5 people were killed and 30+ injured when a guy started shooting at an airport in Florida. The gunman was an Iraq combat veteran, who told people in 2016 that he thought the government was controlling his mind. He had PTSD. Most Americans forgot about this incident by next month.
  • Donald “tiny-hands” Trump becomes president via electoral college win*. His first official press conference since the election was mainly about how unfair the media treated him in the prior year.
  • Obama deployed 3000 troops to Poland in order to intimidate Russia and reassure NATO.
  • The Department of Justice released a report that exposed Chicago’s police department was using excessive force, particularly toward minorities. Chicago officials are claiming they will do something about it.
  • Obama commuted the rest of Chelsea Manning’s sentence**. He also commuted the sentences of 300+ non-violent drug offenders, perhaps as an apology for doing nothing about the fake war on drugs.
  • President Trump began his assault on the environment. He put the Dakota Access and Keystone XL pipelines back in motion, so they can now leak oil into our ground. He cut off funding to our Environmental Protection Agency, and issued orders to keep them from communicating with the country via social media or press.
  • The stock market surges as rich people get excited about all the money they will make and save via corruption now.
  • Trump starts trying to ban all Muslim nationals from getting into the country, except from Saudi Arabia*** (where most of the 9/11 attackers were from).
  • Trump nominates a strongly conservative judge to the US Supreme Court, after Republicans spent 2016 blocking Obama’s previous nomination. The Democratic Party put up a (purposefully?) weak resistance to the nomination, in a continuation of the political incompetence that caused 2016 to play out the way it did. I guess they thought it wasn’t worth it, since the guy they nominated in 2016 wasn’t much of a liberal. They aren’t really liberals, either.

We’re just getting started.

Footnotes are for people reading in the far future:

*An electoral college win is when most people wanted a different person to win, but our elite establishment has enough wiggle room to elect their preferred candidate.

**Chelsea Manning (aka Bradley Manning) released a bunch of secret documents that exposed international corruption, and human rights violations being committed by our country at war.

***Saudi Arabia was a Muslim country that could tell the USA what to do, because they had strong influence over the world’s oil market.